Huston we have a problem! In today’s society, it is well known that we humans tend to be stressed and unhappy; but did you know that also our pigs now suffer from unhappiness? Several pigs walk around with straight tails; this is a sign that they are unhappy. When our pigs are miserable we also get poor meat quality, which is not good for our health. So what can we do to improve the pigs’ conditions, except for curling their tails with a curler?
To begin with, pigs live in small crowded bins. These do not let the pigs get their well-needed space to relax or get their own time; something also these creatures need. Crowded, tight spaces makes the pigs more stressed, which often results in overeating, and in turn gives us unhealthy pork.
Further, the pig feed we present and give these animals is often made to fatten them; it is mainly junk food. The forage if full of fat and glucose syrup, and this forces the pigs to eat more than they should since it to them tastes very good. By overeating, the pork quality is also effected because these animals are fed with only junk.
Finally, we all know how much pigs enjoy their mud baths. But, unfortunately, they do not get to have these baths as often as they would like to. This in its turn makes them feel depressed, because they do not get their fun-time. As we know, it is crucial that we humans have fun, otherwise, we end up angry and depressed; this also happens to the pigs when they do not get to play and have fun. When it comes to the pork, it always tastes better when we know the animal has lived a happy life.
The solution to these problems could be that we make new rules for the pig farmers to follow. A pig needs more space to feel happy; therefore, I suggest that one rule could be that a pig must have at least 10 square meters to walk around and live in. In addition, this living arrangement must also be connected to their outdoor mud bath, so that the pigs are free to roll around and get dirty whenever. As a final point, I think it is essential that we feed our pigs with food that is full of nutrition and maybe ecological farmed. All these things should help the pigs’ lives become better and in turn, we will receive healthier and tastier meat.
There are many benefits to these suggestions: the pigs get to live happy lives, while we get healthy and better pork. In addition, we might get a clear conscious, since it also benefits the earth if we farm ecological and it helps the pigs become happy. Thus, even though the costs for these changes are quite severe, we will win in the end by getting happy pigs and healthy pork.
This is a very good casual analysis!
SvaraRaderaYou get the attention directly from the beginning by telling the reader that we have a problem - and by using Houston we get the hang of the importance!
I think your ideas of how we are going to solve the problem with unhappy pigs and why, are really convincing!
You compare the humans and the pigs and also point out that the meat will be affected by the unhappiness.
You have thought of the linking between the paragraphs, you stick to your well supported topics through the paragraphs. You have in the last paragraph thought of the costs; your counterargument, and you have a good argument for why we should pay up: healthy pork and happy pigs – your refutation of the counterargument. You also sum up your analysis in the last paragraph.
However, In the third paragraph I do not know if you actually meant “produce” instead of present? Otherwise there are two different words for “give”. You have a small misspelling - Huston - Houston. But this are small mistakes in an otherwise smashing essay with a good language, almost correct spelling and not to long sentences.
You are brilliant, Vicky!
Of course this is an PROBLEM SOLVING ANALYSIS - NOTHING ELSE!!! I have my head somewhere else, I think!
SvaraRadera